Swirly Apple Poison Punch

Swirly Apple Poison

There are plenty of awesome ways to trick out your Halloween treats – I’m going to pat myself on the back for that one – but many of them involve black lights, dry ice, fire, or food coloring, and I’d personally prefer to spend more time drinking my drinks than managing their levels of apparent radioactivity. (Plus, food coloring gives me the creeps. There are few things more disconcerting than taking a sip of a neon-blue, chocolate flavored cocktail).

Instead, we took a page from the highly gimmicky and extraordinarily disgusting Viniq, a liqueur that resembles nail polish and is so offensively flavored that it may in fact be better used for that purpose. To give you a quick description, it sort of tastes like somebody put cheap vodka in cheap wine and added the flavoring from purple Gatorade –

Oh, wait. That’s exactly what it is.

Swirly Apple Poison

But the cool thing about Viniq and its cousins “Ruby” and “Glow” is that, with a little bit of agitation, the liquid does shimmer as the advertisements claim. This marketing technique may come off as offensively juvenile, and that’s because it is, but there would be no other way to sell something so bad without it. And yet somehow that special shimmer might tempt you into buying this product regardless. (It worked on me, at least.)

For all your Halloween purposes and to keep you from making the same mistake I did, however, Sarah and I have managed to steal this little secret ingredient so that you can have all the benefits of tricking your friends into thinking you’re drinking a cosmetic product without feeling like you actually are. Even better, that ingredient is actually widely available: food-grade / non-toxic luster dust.

Luster dust is used to decorate cakes, chocolates, icing, etc., and it comes in a variety of colors – but not all luster dust is intended for consumption, and this can depend on brand and color. So that you don’t wind up pranking your respiratory system instead of your friends, I urge you to check the label and make sure what you’ve bought doesn’t wind up bedazzling the inside of your vital organs.

In this case, we’ve mixed food-grade gold luster dust into a delicious, no-fuss, fall-themed cocktail that you can make in batches for your upcoming shindigs. The result is a tasty drink with all the flare needed to accent your party, your costume, and the new levels of drunkenness you’ll reach. The best part is that, unlike with other shimmery things you can drink, you’ll actually enjoy getting there!

Swirly Apple Poison Punch

Swirly Apple Poison

For one serving:

  • 4 oz. apple cider
  • 1.5 oz. fireball
  • 1.5 oz. pomegranate
  • .75 oz. grenadine
  • 1 tsp. luster dust

Shake over ice, strain, and serve!

TIP: The luster dust will settle in the bottom of a container. If you plan to make a large batch, I suggest you either: (1) don’t put it in any container that can’t be shaken before serving it, or (2) mix the luster dust into the Fireball and add it separately as drinks are poured. That way the shimmer effect will be preserved.

Happy Halloween!


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